“Moses said to God, ‘Why are you treating me this way? What did I ever do to you to deserve this?’ ‘I can’t do this by myself — it’s too much, all these people.
“If this is how you intend to treat me, do me a favor and kill me. I’ve seen enough; I’ve had enough. Let me out of here.’”
Sometimes you come to the end of your rope and the end of yourself. “I can’t do this by myself.” It’s a place of pain. Like Moses, your soul screams at God, “What did I ever do to you to deserve this? It’s too much.” Dark thoughts of personal demise float through your mind... Why doesn’t God just “do me a favor and kill me?”
“I’ve seen enough; I’ve had enough.
Let me out of here.”
God called Moses to perform a task. Then He made it impossible for Moses to succeed. Moses cried out, “I can’t do this myself.” He was stuck between the absolute awareness of God’s calling and utter impossibility of its fulfillment. That’s a rough place to be. It’s the place of pain, hopelessness, despair. It’s worse than death. In fact, some reasonable people would opt to die rather than to suffer more pain. Unfortunately, God’s plan of redemptive suffering does not include an ‘easy way out.’ Moses was stuck. He felt betrayed by God.
“I’ve seen enough; I’ve had enough. Let me out of here.”
Are you in the place of pain? Hang on. God reveals His purpose in time. Hold steady. It’s in the place of pain (and only this place) that one develops the depth of character necessary to carry out His will. You may not want to perform the will of the Lord at this price. You may not want this depth of character. But it was never really your choice. It’s God’s choice for you. Moses, Job, David, Elijah, Paul and many others survived the place of pain. They are not our only examples. Jesus also hit His personal bottom at the place of pain. He literally sweat blood there (Luke 22.44). Christ discovered His absolute alone-ness in the place of pain (John 16.32). He suffered the betrayal of His Heavenly Father and even died there.
“…Jesus cried out with a loud voice, saying,
‘My God, My God, why have You forsaken Me?’”
“And Jesus cried out again with a loud voice, and yielded up His spirit.”
Matthew 27.46, 50 NKJV
Pain does not last forever. It ends well. Though not immediately visible, there is a redemptive purpose for your suffering in the place of pain.